My guilty pleasure — Tidying Up with Marie Kondo

A version of this article first appeared on the mexi-minnesotana blog on January 17, 2019.

I used to “treat” myself to episodes of the show released in 2018 by Netflix, Tidying Up with Marie Kondo. Perhaps my ADHD self feels nourished by the idea that I might not be totally hopeless in my efforts to manage the avalanche that grows in my home every winter.

Marie Kondo has the most joyful and optimistic spirit. I love her way of greeting the house in the beginning and taking a moment to thank the home for the protection it has provided to the family. She also asks for cooperation with the project ahead. Truly, her way of approaching it makes the process of clearing seem sacred, rather than a chore.

One thing that bothers me about these projects is that the women always seem to feel excessive amounts of guilt over the mess. The men very seldom feel guilt, though they often seem to feel frustrated with the women over not being able to keep things clean.

My mixed reaction is probably due to my feminist complaint regarding women as the presumed keepers of the home, along with my desire to have vastly less STUFF. I love the feeling of open space that comes with removing clutter. And of course I also love my bookshelves full of precious gems.

It does seem that the couples from the show who start with skepticism eventually get to a place of actually enjoying the process of de-cluttering. By the end of the first two episodes, there were drastic transformations, and also very happy couples much more content with their relationships as well as their space. They appear joyous and radiant after the transformation.

This is re-igniting my desire to continue with my own de-clutter process. Now that I work from home more, when I am not careful my things can pile up quickly. Putting it all away at the end of the day so I can relax is an important discipline I tried long before the pandemic.

My ADHD can make it difficult to KEEP things clean, and the end of the day I’ve gotten my work table completely covered. Now in those final 10–15 minutes of my work day I take stock, write down my small wins, and consciously feel gratitude for the blessings in my life. I sift the detritus of my desk, gather papers into a pile and figure out what’s my main job for the next day.

The card table that served as my work desk gets put away. While it may seem physically inefficient to fold it out and tuck it away daily, it signals to my brain the transition I need to remember that work does not equal life. It opens the space for fun, even if my mind wants to linger on the things I didn’t get done. Sometimes our bodies have to re-teach us what our minds forget. We are enough in this moment, and every moment.

What’s your guilty pleasure? And what does it say about what you truly need?